


He deserves Happiness

by MiriamMT



Series: Gallavich OneShots (no smut) [4]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Good Dad Mickey, Lost Love, M/M, Teenage Yevgeny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2019-10-28
Packaged: 2021-01-04 00:41:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21188687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiriamMT/pseuds/MiriamMT
Summary: Yevgeny kisses a boy and Mickey tells him about the love of his life: Ian Gallagher.Yevgeny goes on an adventure to find the lost love of his dad.





	He deserves Happiness

A 13-year-old Yevgeny Milkovich sat on the couch with his best friend Damian.  
Damian was a beautiful boy in Yevgenys eyes, far more beautiful than some of the girls in his school.  
He had curly dark hair, his pale face covered in freckles, beautiful green eyes.

Yevgeny couldn't even count the minutes and hours and days he spend just thinking about his friends face, the times he stared at him, looking away shyly when Damian would catch him. Like right now.

"Why are you always staring at me?", Damian asked suddenly.  
"I'm not" Yevgeny murmured.  
"You are" Damian chuckled "You think I'm pretty?"  
Yevgeny felt himself blushing.  
"I think you're pretty."  
"I'm not pretty!" Yevgeny said "I don't wanna be pretty, I wanna be hot."  
"Okay, you're hot then." Damian smiled.  
"Why are you saying that?", Yevgeny whispered.  
"Because it's true. Maybe because I wanna kiss you."  
Yevgenys blond head shot up.  
"Really?", Damian nodded, "I wanna kiss you too." He admitted.

Before either boy could process it, they were kissing each other, inexperienced lips finding together in a sloppy kiss.  
Yevgeny felt like he could do that for hours. Damian's hand was in Yev's blond hair, Yev's arms around Damian's waist.

"What the fuck", they were suddenly interrupted by a loud voice, the boys pulled back quickly, shocked to see Yevgenys dad Mickey there.  
He just stared at his son, turned around and left the house again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yevgeny stepped outside, Damian had already left through the back door, too afraid to face the thug outside.  
"Dad?", Yev asked his dad who sat on the steps to the front porch, "please don't be mad at me...."  
Mickeys head shot up.  
"Mad at you?", he asked surprised, "Yevy sit down."  
Yevgeny sat down next to him curious about what his father had to say.

"You think you're gay?"  
Yevgeny shrugged, "I don't know, I just know that I wanted to kiss Damian, that I think he's beautiful."  
Mickey smiled, he took a deep breath.  
"I'm gay" even after all those years in that he accepted himself it was weird to actually say it "I never thought there would be a situation were I'd have to tell you that. Just know, that I'm here for you, if you wanna talk about it."

Yevgeny made big eyes at his dad.  
"You're gay?"  
"You know that your mom and I are more friends than a couple."  
Yev nodded, his parents never acted like all the other parents, never were a couple, more friends. It took them some time to actually explain that fact to their son.  
"Were you ever in love with another man?" Yev asked.  
Mickey sighed deeply.

"Yeah. Yeah I was, I am still in love him. But uhm, that's already a long fucking time ago."  
"Can you tell me about him?", for Yevgeny who never witnessed his dad in any loving relationship, never close to another person, this was beyond interesting. He always felt like Mickey was somehow unhappy with his life in general.

"His name was Ian" Mickey said, he wasn't sure why he would tell Yevy about the man he loves so much it still hurts, but now that his son is probably facing similar problems like himself back then, he felt like he owed him some honesty.  
"Ian Gallagher."  
"Like Lip Gallagher?", Yev asked "_the_ south side drunk?"  
Mickey nodded "His brother. He had red hair, green eyes, covered in freckles when we were young but they faded away with the time. He was nice and... good, sensitive. Always made me feel comfortable with myself, made me feel good and loved. Actually, we weren't in a relationship in the beginning, just hooked up a few times."  
"Hooked up? So you just had sex with him?"  
"I'm telling you this so you don't make the same mistakes Yevy. I fell in love with him. Took me a long time to admit that to myself. You remember your grandpa Terry?"

Yevgeny nodded, Terry died a few years ago, nobody was exactly sad about it.  
"He hated gay people. I knew he would kill me if he'd ever found out. Ian and I started when he was 15 and I was 17. When he was 17 and I was 19, Grandpa Terry caught us together. At that point I was already madly in love with Ian, but Terry caught us. I spare you the details, that are things you shouldn't know about. But two months later he forced me to marry your mother. Ian asked me not to do it. Begged me, but I was afraid of my dad."  
"So you married mom"

Mickey nodded "Inbetween I did some things to Ian I'm not proud of, hurt him. But nothing was as bad as the pain on his face when I married Svet."  
"You regret marrying her?" Yevy asked he wasn't sure when he came into the picture, did his dad regret him as well?  
"Yeah. I regret marrying her, but I didn't had a choice. And it had nothing to do with you, you were already on the way. Ian was so hurt by that marriage that he ran away. Ran to the military or something."

"And that's the last time you saw him?"  
"No" Mickey shook his head "No, the last time I saw him, I remember it clearly. It was one of the worst days of my life. Well both times he left were the worst days in my life. Your auntie Mandy made me go look for him. I found him working in a gay bar, brought him home. We were a couple for a few weeks. You were born during that time. I lived at the Gallagher house. Ian always wanted to be open about the relationship. Wanted me to tell everyone that I'm gay and that he's my boyfriend."

"Why didn't you?"  
"Why didn't I?", Mickey smiled sadly, "at the after party of your babtising? With my homophobic piece of shit father and the whole rest of my family? I was afraid. I was a fucking pussy. I couldn't say it, couldn't do it, so I watched him leave. I tried to talk to him afterwards, called him a thousand times, went to his house ten times a day, but he left Chicago. I never heard from him again. Never saw him again. I sometimes still think about how it would be if he would've stayed. You would've loved him Yevy. He took care of you before I did. When your mom brought you to his house to talk to me, he got all the old baby things from his brother and brought them over so you wouldn't be cold. He visited Svet when I refused, played with you. I wish you could remember him, you would've liked him more than me."  
Mickey sighed. He sounded so incredibly sad, it made Yevgeny almost cry.

Mickey patted Yev's shoulder, stood up and walked inside the house.

When Yevgeny lay in bed that night he made a decision:  
He would search and find Ian Gallagher and he would bring him back to his dad.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The day after Mickey told Yevgeny about Ian, he left the house already early in the morning. Mickey was passed out in his room anyways, he got drunk last night, trying to drink the memories away like he tried so many times before.

Svetlana was glad, that Mickey wasn't an angry drunk like his dad. He was more a sad drunk, locking himself in his room, over the years, especially after Ian left, Svetlana was worried a few times, he would've killed himself. But he didn't.

Yevgeny walked over to the Gallagher House, knocking on the door.  
A girl, a year younger than him, with orange hair opened the door.  
"Hey Franny", he greeted her.  
"Milkovich, what do you want here?"  
"Need to talk to one of your uncles."  
"Which one? I've got like... four", the girl crossed her arms before her chest.  
"Do you have an uncle called Ian?"  
Franny's face went from bored to confused as fuck in a second.

"Uncle Ian? Yeah, But I don't see him often. How do you even know about him? He doesn't live around here."  
"I need to talk with one of your uncles, that knows where Ian is. Who of them were closest to him?"  
"That would be Lip, I guess. But why do you care anyways?"  
"It's something about... my dad", Yevgeny admitted, "And Ian, they used to be friends. I wanna find Ian to cheer my dad up."  
"An adventure? Can I join you?"  
"I- "  
"Oh, please, Yevgeny! It's my uncle you're looking for, let me come with you!"  
Yevgeny rolled his eyes at the 12-year-old but nodded.

Franny took her sneakers and a key and jumped down from the porch.  
"Lip's gonna be at the alibi, come on!"  
Yevgeny never had much to do with the Gallagher's, he knew Franny from school, he used to play with her and the Ball-twins or triplets however you wanna count that, when his mom would bring him over to the Gallagher babysitting during the summer.  
But apart from that, he always got the cue, to stay away from them.  
He knew Auntie Mandy had some trouble with the town drunk, Lip Gallagher, but maybe it was also because of the Ian and Mickey incident.

The Alibi was a small bar, run by Kevin Ball.  
Lip Gallagher, who allegedly was the smartest Gallagher with the most chance for a future, followed into his late father's footsteps, always sitting in the bar, getting drunk.

"No children in the bar", Kev said when they entered, he didn't care though, he wouldn't give them alcohol, but they could be in here. He just needed to say that, in case some cop happened to be in.  
Franny and Yevgeny made their way to the bar, approaching Lip on his stool.

"What do you want? And what are you doing with the Milkovich?", Lip asked taking a sip from his beer.  
Yevgeny sat next to him.  
"Do you know were Ian is?"  
"Ian? Did your father send you?"  
"No, I wanna find him."  
"Why?"  
"Dad told me about him. I want to bring Ian back to Mickey", he told Lip his plan.  
Lip laughed out loud, "What are you living in a fucking rom-com movie? You know shit about the two of them, you know shit about your dad."

"Lip, stop", Kev said, "Mickey's a fine guy, he loved Ian."  
"Bulshit"  
Yevgeny looked up at Kevin, "You knew about it?"  
"I'm a bartender, kid, and I'm not as stupid as Lip here might think."  
"Can you tell me more about them?"

"The first time I noticed something was when Ian took off for the first time", Kevin began, "Mickey sat there", he pointed to the end of the bar, "Getting drunk. He started asking random question, if I heard anything from Ian, pretending he wouldn't care the next second. At some point he blurted out, that he liked carrot tops, said something about alien-looking and freckles, I think. I needed some time to put two and two together, but looking back, it was rather obvious. However, we told him to fuck the redhaired girl that sat at a table. After that I found one of my mirrors smashed in rage. That girl wouldn't talk about it, just said, Mickey was weird. However, a few weeks later your mom and dad had a fight here in the bar. She said, that she made 'carrot boy' leave. There it clicked for me, you know? Asking about Ian, being sad, shortly after Ian was gone, Ian leaving shortly after the wedding, crying about redheads and then carrot boy. Ian. He went off and found him, that's how it is. And Svetlana made him go back to the Gallagher house."

"Your mom is cunt, is what he's trying to say", Lip interrupted.  
"My mom isn't a cunt! Fucking drunk asshole", Lip only scoffed and took another gulp from his drink.  
"She was kind of a bitch. But she became nicer after you were born. However, the party of your baptising, was here. I stood at the bar, so I heard Ian and Mick talking, it was heart-breaking, really."  
"How old are you kid?", Lip interrupted again.  
"Thirteen."  
"It was thirteen fucking years ago, don't act like you remember all this shit in detail, Kev!"

"It was heart-breaking, okay? I thought a lot about that, I'm a very sensitive guy", he put his big hand over his heart, "Apparently, Svetlana wanted that Ian leaves, but Ian wouldn't go. He wanted Mickey to stop lying and finally come out to his family, because he's not free, when they're a secret or something. However, Mickeys next words, they really touched me. I'll never forget them, because it might be the best, most loving thing I've ever heard."  
"What did he say?", Yevgeny asked, he never heard his dad saying something affectionate, something romantic.  
"He said, 'Ian, what you and I have makes me free, not what those assholes know'."

"I call bulshit!", Lip yelled.  
"He said it!", Kevin insisted, "It was beautiful. Mickey is a really sensitive and soft guy at heart. That heart is just locked away behind walls of stone and boxes of steel, you moron."  
"That heart is cold and dead!"  
"Maybe, but if, then just because your brother killed it, when he left!"

"What was Ian's answer?", Yevgeny interrupted the shouting men, "What could he say to that?"  
"I don't know, kid", Kevin said with an apologetic look in his eyes, "In that moment Terry came in and Mickey literally ran away from Ian. Later, Ian cried, when Mickey was busy acting straight with Svet, you and his dad, then Mickey and he had a talk and Ian left. You could see Mickeys heart breaking on spot. I'll never forget that look."

Yevgeny sighed, he looked over to Franny, who took a deep breath to hold back some tears.  
"That's a nice little story you're telling about my oh, so evil brother. But that's only the end, that's nothing."  
"Then tell me about the rest.", Yevgeny said.  
"You don't wanna know, kid."  
"I do! Dad said, the two of them just hooked up in the beginning. He just said, that at some point Grandpa Terry caught them. He said, I didn't have to know the details."  
"Well, that might be the only true thing he ever said."  
"I wanna know."  
"God, why is this so important to you? What do you care, who your dad banged thirteen years ago?"

"Because", Yev started yelling, but sighed and continued quieter, "Because he is fucking unhappy. Because he talked about Ian, as if he was the only good thing he ever had and as if only he could make him happy again. I just wanna see him happy, he's a good person. Never hit me or mom, never got angry when he was drunk, he is a good dad. He deserves better. He deserves love."

Lip shook his head, while Kevin dried a glass, with a compassionate look on his face and Franny dried a tear that actually escaped her eyes.

  
"Don't make life harder for yourself kid. What happened back then? You don't wanna know. You out of all people."  
"I want to know. Lip, please."  
Lip gnawed on his bottom lip, then looked at Kev.  
"Give me something stronger for that story. And better something for the kid as well."  
"No, I don't drink yet."  
"You will, after you heard that."

"Ian was fucking his boss, Ian was 15, the other guy 40", Lip began.  
"What, Ian fucked Kash?", Kevin asked disgusted.  
"May I tell the story?", Kevin nodded, "Mickey was always shoplifting in Kash's store. At some point, I don't know anymore, Mickey hit Kash, stole something from him, Ian went over to the Milkovich house, and Ian and Mickey had a fist fight. Then they started fucking all of a sudden instead of fighting. After that they would fuck around regularly, until Kash caught them and shot Mickey in the leg. Mickey would rather go to juvie for shoplifting, than admit that he's gay. He was in and out of prison a lot around that time, just so no one would get, that he's gay. It was a weird time. It took Mickey more than two years to pluck up the courage to kiss Ian. Just kiss him!"

"Well, you knew his dad, was that really a surprise though? His whole childhood was probably filled with sexism and homophobia, look how Terry treated his family! He killed his own wife."  
"You have no idea", Lip scowled, "You don't know shit. Terry? He was a monster. He used to rape Mandy, you knew that?"  
"Auntie Mandy?", Yevgeny gasped.  
"His own fucking daughter, got drunk and mistook her for her mom. You remember when we crowdfunded her abortion? Think about it, Ian pretended to be the father, but he's gay."  
"Shit, I think I'm gonna be sick", Kevin whispered.

"You really wanna hear what he did when he caught Mickey and Ian together? Fucking on the couch?"  
Yevgeny swallowed hard, he tried to shake the picture of his aunt in his head, "I want to hear it."

Lip shook his head, "He beat them up. Ian at first, Mickey pulled him down from him, that's what he told me. Terry then proceeded to beat up Mickey. He almost killed him. Ian said, that there were seconds, were he actually thought, Mickey was dead.", Lip stared into his glass.

Yevgeny took a deep breath, he remembered the day before, when he asked his dad if he was mad at him for kissing a guy. How surprised he looked, how hurt he sounded, he had flashbacks at that moment, Yevgeny was sure.

"Then he called Svetlana.", Yevgeny looked up in fear, "He told her to fuck the gay out of him.", Lip turned to face Yevgeny, "Your grandpa, told your mom to rape Mickey, while holding Ian at gunpoint. During that rape, she got pregnant. With you."

Yevgeny felt like his whole world shattered.  
He thought about his parents who were friends, who lived in one house and raised one son, who loved each other platonically, how could it be, that this story was the origin of that? He felt sick suddenly, he got up quickly and headed to the restrooms.

Lip took his drink and followed Yevgeny to the restroom, where he threw up in a toilette.  
"I'm sorry, kid. I told you, you won't like to hear it. Sometimes it's better to not dig up the past."  
Yevgeny sat on the disgusting ground and took a deep breath.  
"Go on, tell the rest of the story."  
"I don't think-"  
"Tell the fucking rest of the story!", Yevgeny yelled, and leaned on the stall door exhausted.

Lip sighed.  
"Mickey went into hiding after the incident. Wouldn't talk to Ian. Mandy told him at some point, Mickey would marry a girl he knocked up. She didn't know about Ian and Mickey at that point. Ian confronted Mickey about it. He, I don't know, he wanted Mickey to admit that he loved him, or some bulshit.", Lip shook his head, trying to remember all those story fragments, all those details, "Mickey beat him up bad. Boxed him in the stomach, punched his face, landed a kick on his jaw so hard, Ian lost a tooth. I mean, I guess I get it? He was traumatised, but that wasn't right though. Ian had more empathy than me. I told him to go look for someone new, but that idiot had to go to the wedding. Asking Mickey to, shit, run away with him into the fucking sunset or something. Mickey married your mom instead. Ian was so heartbroken, that he tried to illegally enlist in the army. He ran away. Worked in a gay club as a stripper."

Yevgeny sat on the ground for a few minutes, when he felt like it, he attempted to stand up. He washed his hands and his face and looked at his pale face in the small bathroom mirror.

  
He took another deep breath and left the restroom, walking back to the bar. He sat next to Lip again, Franny sat on his other side now, instead next to her uncle. Lip put a drink in front of him.  
"Just in case you need it now."

Yevgeny only shook his head, he felt Franny's hand on his back.  
"Where is Ian now?"  
"What makes you think, Ian would want to see Mickey again?", Lip asked bitterly.  
"I'll see if he wants to see him again, when I speak to him. Where did he go?"

Lip sighed again, "Everywhere, pretty much. He travelled around with our mom for some time, then landed himself in New York. He became an EMP, made a road trip to LA, settled in San Francisco for a while, lived in the place, he thought was the exact middle of America. He did a lot of crazy stuff.", he swallowed, "He... He's in Chicago right now. North Side. Working as an EMT."  
"What? For how long already?"  
"I don't know, what month do we have? June? For four months maybe?"  
"Could you... could you give us the address?"  
Lip looked down at his glass.  
"Please, uncle Lip.", Franny begged, Lip looked up at Kevin, asking for advice, he just nicked in the kids' direction, so Lip sighed and scribbled an address on a small piece of paper.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~++

Yevgeny and Franny sat on the L on their way to Ian Gallagher.  
"Are you okay Yev?", Franny asked, "I know, that was a lot."  
Yevgeny nodded, he was still shaking.  
"If it helps you in any way... my family isn't perfect either. Look at Lip, he was supposed to the smart one, the one with a future, now he's drinking beer after beer at the Alibi. My mom had me when she was fifteen, because she wanted to be part of my dad's family."  
Yevgeny smiled at her, "Thanks for trying, but I don't think that you can compare that."

"Your parents are friends after all, aren't they?"  
"Yeah, I guess, they're really good friends actually. But to think about, how that happened... and my dad had to live with us as constant reminder, and yet, he is such a good dad! You have no idea, mom would sometimes tell me about her old family in Russia, I heard auntie Mandy talk about her boyfriends and when Terry was still alive, he would always get so angry when he drank, I know what a bad person does. Dad never did such a thing, never hit me or mom, never would angry drink, he is a good person, he deserves some happiness after all that shit that happened."

Franny nodded.  
"I just hope, that uncle Ian doesn't ruin your plan.", she mumbled and looked at the boy, "And you're a good person too, for doing this, Yev."  
Yev nodded and sighed.

"I kissed a boy yesterday", he said.  
Franny raised her eyebrows.  
"Dad caught us, and I was afraid, he'd be mad at me. He just sat down with me and said, that I could talk to him about it, that he understands me", Yev took a deep breath, "Today I had to hear, what happened when his dad caught him in a similar situation. Do you know, how fucking lucky I am? And my dad got nothing but shit in return. Ian's my last hope... my last hope to ever see him happy... his last hope on... being... happy."

Franny stroked a strand of red hair behind her ear and desperately hoped, that Ian wouldn't disappoint Yevgeny.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They remained silent for the rest of the way. Yevgeny has never been to the northside before, so he just mindlessly followed Franny, who looked the way up on her phone.  
"It's so much lighter here", Yevgeny whispers, "I don't get it, just because they have more money, they're allowed to live in nice houses with flowers in the windows?"  
"You can put a flower in your window, Yev.", Franny said.  
"But our house is still shit.", he said, they stopped abruptly when Franny's phone said, they reached Ian's address, "I bet he doesn't have holes in his walls"

Yevgeny never had a problem with his neighbourhood, he loved his neighbourhood, he liked the old house and the stories and memories his uncles and auntie Mandy would talk about. But when a small southside boy walks those streets of the "better people" he feels bad all of a sudden.

Franny and Yevgeny waited in front of the apartment complex for someone to come out, so they could slip past the door.  
Then they walked up the stairs, reading every name tag.

"Got it!", Franny yelled suddenly, "Gallagher."  
"What are you waiting for? Knock or something?"  
"Why me? It was your idea."  
"It's your uncle. If he sees me through the peephole, he won't open."  
Franny rolled her eyes.

"Chicken", she mocked.  
"Fuck off", growled the Milkovich.  
Franny knocked on the door.

A few minutes later, it was opened and a tall man with red hair similar to Franny's stood in the doorway.  
"Franny? Is that you?", Franny nodded, "Oh my god, hey!", he embraced her in a hug, "How do you know I'm here, what are you doing here, come in!", he babbled.  
"Uncle Ian, wait."  
Ian, who had already turned around to show her the apartment, faced them and now noticed the boy stand behind her.

"Who are- ", he stopped himself, he saw the boy in front of him, looked him up and down in disbelieve. He had his father's eyes, Ian would recognise them everywhere. Also, now, that he had a closer look, he saw the overall strong family resemblance to Mickey and Mandy.

"Fuck, you look exactly like him", he whispered, the boy had blonde and not black hair, but Ian was one of the few people who knew, that Mickey was actually a natural blonde, but not that fucking Angel blonde Yev was sporting, more a dark, dirty colour, and dyed his hair black.  
"Can we come in now?", Franny asked.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yevgeny and Franny sat on Ian's dark blue couch. Ian was uneasy, he sat in the armchair across from them. Eyeing Yevgeny.  
"What brings you here?", he asked quietly.  
"We've been looking all day for you", Franny answered, when she noticed, Yevgeny wouldn't.  
"Why? You don't even know me Yevgeny."

Yevgeny swallowed, "Dad told me about you... yesterday."  
Ian took a deep breath, busying his hands with pulling loose threads from a blanket.  
"Didn't think, he'd still think about me... let alone talk about me."

"He does. He said... he told me about your relationship, that he loves you. He told me, how much he loved you then and that he still does. And that you leaving him was one of the worst days in his life... both times."  
Ian didn't know what to say. He didn't think, that Mickey would still have these feelings after more than twelve years.

"You don't know the whole story, Yevgeny...", he tried to talk himself out of this situation, of the wave of guilt that swapped over him yet again.  
"I do", Yevgeny interrupted, "Trust me, I do know, the whole story. I spend the day listening to Kevin and your brother Lip. I know all of it. What Terry did, I mean. Why I overall exist. That you wanted Dad to come out and that he was afraid and that you left."

"You came here to blame me? Make me feel guilty?"  
"No. No, I... I want dad to be happy. He wasn't happy at all for... forever. The way he talks about you, I know, only you can make him happy."

"I'm done with that part of my life.", Ian whispered, knowing that it was a lie.  
"Are you? Because he's not and I doubt that you are. Why else, would you jump from city to city in the whole fucking states? You don't exactly look like you're over him. I just want to tell you how amazing Mickey is."

Ian sighed, "I know that he is amazing. I've loved him deeply for a big part of my life, you don't need to tell me why."  
"You never saw him as a dad though. He said, he would still think about how things would've been, if you would've stayed. He said, I would've liked you more than him at some point, he said, that you took care of me before he did.", Ian couldn't look at the Milkovich boy, how often had he dreamed about the same thing, about some kind of alternative family structure with Mickey, Svet, Yev and him.  
"That doesn't mean anything, you were an infant back then."  
"You did it though. I was your boyfriends rape child and you took care of me."

Ian's head shot up at those words. He didn't really process earlier, that Lip must've told him about the day Terry caught them.  
"Don't call yourself that", he said empathetical, "Don't disregard yourself like that."

"Why not? It's true, isn't it? All of it. But even though, that happened, Mickey is an amazing dad. I think you should know that. He was never happy again, after you left, but he and mom took care of me together, he never hit us, never got too loud and screamed, never angry-drank. Mom says, he's a sad drinker. After we talked about you yesterday, he locked himself in his room with his whiskey. He deserves better than this. He deserves better than to be unhappy and alone for the rest of his life."

Yevgeny leaned back on the sofa, looking helplessly at Franny.  
"Did you ever think about him? Uncle Ian?"  
Ian opened his mouth, closed it again, bit his bottom lip.  
"All the time", he finally answered, "But he... you are children, you don't understand this. Doesn't he deserve something better than me?"

Yev and Franny look at him confused.  
"I mean... instead of respecting his boundaries, I've always pushed him and pushed him and got mad, when he wouldn't cross the millionth line for me. I wanted to force him to come out, only douchbags do such a thing. Especially because.... Terry was there and I knew what that fucking meant. I thought, if I'd just stay away long enough, we could both get on with our lives... find other people, get... over each other.", he vocalised all his insecurities and hopes of the past years.

"And how is that working out for you?", Franny asked annoyed, "I'm fed up with that fucking whining. I had to listen to that whole story of the two of you today, in all it's painful and disgusting details. And I'm mad at so many people right now! Now will you please, just fucking get your ass up and go back to Mickey?!"

Ian and Yevgeny both looked at her in disbelief.  
"Yeah,", Yevgeny said loudly, "What she said!"

Ian starred at his niece.  
"Terry died", Yevgeny added, "There is no reason for the two of you to bath in self-pity and sadness, when you could just go back. And don't come at me with 'it's not that easy' or 'you don't understand', because it really just is that fucking easy!"

Ian was still silent.  
"It's an easy yes or no question", Yev continued, "Do you want to be with Mickey or not? Everything else is secondary."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was an exhausting day for the Gallagher girl and the Milkovich boy.  
They sat next to each other in the L. Yevgeny texted his parents, that he would come home now.  
"Yev, when are you going to show me your boyfriend?", Franny whispered so the other people couldn't hear them.  
"Shht! I don't know if he is that, yet."  
"Fricking, ask him then, will you?"  
"No, I... I don't think I can just do that...", he murmured.  
"Really?", Franny asked, "After today you wanna fucking chicken out too?"  
He sighed and put his phone down. Maybe yes, maybe he wanted to chicken out too.

The Gallagher's house was on the way to the Milkovich's, so Franny said her goodbyes and ran across the street when they passed the house.  
Yevgeny stopped on the stairs to his own house and turned around.

Ian Gallagher stood near the fence and stared up to the house.  
"You coming or what?"  
He bit his lip.  
"I don't think-"  
"Then don't think"

Yes, The Gallagher really decided to come with him. To see Mickey again, to talk to Mickey again. But he was so scared. So scared with no reason. What did he think was going to happen? That Mickey changed his mind within a day and didn't love him anymore?

He waited for Ian to climb up the steps and stepped inside the house.  
"Yevy? That you?", he heard his dad's voice from the kitchen.  
He saw Ian's eyes widen at the sound of that voice.  
"Yeah", he called back.  
"Svet is out tonight, so I... let's say 'cooked dinner'."  
Yevy scrunched up his nose, making Ian smile.  
"Wait here, a second."

Yevgeny walked into the kitchen were Mickey stood in front of the oven.  
"You know that thing is broken?"  
"Yeah, but it seemed safer then to try the stove. You know what happened last time."  
Yevgeny smiled and nodded.

"What were you up to today anyways? Left before any of us were up, that's odd."  
"Had something to do."  
"Yeah, what? Did your uncle try talking you into joining his drug business again?"  
"No, something important came up."  
Mickey looked at his son confused, he just motioned him to go into the living room.

Mickey didn't know what to expect, what when he stood in the middle of the room, he suddenly came face to face with a redhaired man.  
He was shocked to say the least.

"Hey Mick", Ian said quietly.  
Mickey couldn't move, he couldn't speak, he couldn't even process what was happening.  
"Your son stood on my doorstep today, telling me, that you miss me", he continued, not being able to look him in the face.  
"He's a stubborn little fucker... he looks like you.", Ian didn't know what to say. He hurt this man so much, how could that ever be okay again?

"I, uhm... I want to apologise. For hurting you... for hurting you quite a few times, I'm so sorry, Mick. I never wanted to... I never wanted to leave you, never wanted to be away from you, but... everything seemed to be against us. I thought, it would be easier for both of us, if I would just... leave. It was a big mistake. All the past years I had to hang on to that little hope, that I made your life easier, by leaving you... minimizing the chance of you getting hurt by your father, minimizing the chances on you being out against your will. A will I never respected. I'm especially sorry for that, just so you know, setting ultimatums, I shouldn't have... ", Ian took a deep breath, the words just flew out of him and he wished, Mickey would somehow stop him from talking, stop him from counting out everything he did wrong, "I'm sorry. Now I had your son sitting in my apartment, telling me, that I didn't make anything better, just made things worse for you. I will never be able to make that up to you. I'm not even sure why I agreed to come here. Beg you for forgiveness? Ask you to take me back? Ask you to start over with me? To forget the past or to continue from the point onwards, where we were still good? Probably all of them"

Mickey still didn't move, and Ian started to panic.  
The redhead bit his bottom lip, trying not to start crying.  
Yevgeny watched them from the kitchen. Hoping his dad would just finally fucking do something!

When Mickey saw the first tear rolling down Ian's face, who looked at the ground to hide it, he snapped out of it.

The Milkovich walked over to the ginger and wrapped his arms around his shoulders, one hand in his hair.  
He couldn't believe it, he was actually touching Ian again, holding him again. He wasn't sure if he would ever find the strength to let go of him again. He held him as tight as he could, not convinced that this was actually happening.  
Ian wrapped his arms around the other man as well, holding on to his dark shirt, afraid, he would collapse if he didn't hold in to him. He hid his face in the crook of his neck.

"You're here", Mickey whispered, "Really here"  
"Yeah, yeah I'm really here."  
Mickey let out a shaky breath, letting a tear escape his eyes.  
"I dreamed about this"  
"Me too, Mick"  
"You're not gonna leave me again?", Ian could hear the fear in his voice. The fear of rejection and being left alone.  
"Never again, I promise, Mick. It's okay, everything's gonna be okay now, yeah?", he felt Mickey nodding on his shoulder, "Will you forgive me for being such an asshole?"  
"I don't care, just stay."  
"Okay", Ian nodded, "I'll stay, forever if you want to."  
"I do"


End file.
